Here are a few past gems:
January 19, 2014
Jack: What's next?
The hubs: We're going to Church.
J: I don't know where Church is! Where's my backpack??
Me: It's right here...why do you need that?
J: I don't know where Church is! Backpack, backpack?! We need the map!
February 9, 2014
Jack: MOM! What you doin' in laundry room?
Me: I'm getting some clothes.
J: Oh ok! See you later, bye!
J: MOM!! You still in there?
J: Ok. How it's goin' in there?
February 11 (Stalling at bedtime edition):
Jack: I have something in my eye. (opens his mouth)
Me: I thought it was your eye?
Jack: (pause, then a gasp) I have TEEF!!
-brief comparison of his "little" teeth to my "big" teeth-
Jack: Lemme see ya big teef! *gasp* Oh mom, they're soooo shiny!!
(This one still makes me laugh out loud when I think about it!)
Feb 14th: Doctor's office edition
Out of the corner of my eye, I see a man walk up behind us as we're waiting to pay.
Jack (loudly): Mom! He's missing one! Yook!
Me: (Silently praying) Please, sweet baby Jesus, don't let it be a leg or an arm that man's missing...(slowly turning around to see it's just a shoe)
Jack (even louder): Hey, you just have one?? Where's your 'nother shoe? You missing one! Where's your shoe?!?
-Thankfully the man just smiled and laughed. Just a few minutes later at the pharmacy, I had to use my best ninja-mom skills to keep the dude from seeing the man who actually was missing both legs...you can't make this stuff up!
Me: Did you finish your cow pouch? (pudding with a cow on the box)
Jack: Yep. I frew it away.
Me: Where did you throw it?
Jack: In da trash.
Me: Are you fibbing?
Jack: (long pause)...Yep. I'll go get it...
Me: Do you like your broccoli?
Me: Did you even take a bite?
Jack: I can't , Mom! It's dirty!
Me: It's not dirty..look, it has cheese on it.
Jack: Oooohhh! Cheese?!? Ok.
Me: Can you take a bite now?
Jack: No, I don't sink so.
Jack: MOM MOM MOM!!!
Jack (panicky): There's something in my mouth!
Me: What is it??
Jack (very calmly): Just my teef.
**Hope you got a chuckle! More to come soon!**